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Redneck Dictionary Of Medical Terms

 1. Benign . . . . What you be after you be eight

 2. Artery . . . . . . . . . . . The study of paintings

 3. Bacteria . . . . . . . . . Back door to cafeteria

 4. Barium . . . . What doctors do when patients die

 5. Cesarean Section . .  . A neighborhood in Rome

 6. CAT Scan . . . . . . . Searching for kitty

 7. Cauterize . . . . . . . . Made eye contact with her

 8. Colic . . . . . . . . . . . A sheep dog

 9. Coma . . . . . . . . . . A punctuation mark

 10. D & C . . . . . . . . . . Where Washington is

 11. Dilate . . . . . . . . . . To live long

 12. Enema . . . . . . . . . Not a friend

 13. Fester . . . . . . . . . Quicker than someone else

 14. Fibula . . . . . . . . . . A small lie

 15. Genital . . . . . . . . . non-Jewish person

 16. GI Series . . . World Series of military baseball

 17. Hangnail . . . . . . What you hang your coat on

 18. Impotent . . . . . . . .Distinguished, well known

 19. Labor Pain . . . . . . Getting hurt at work

 20. Medical Staff . . . . .A Doctor's cane

 21. Morbid . . . . . . . . . A higher offer than I bid

 22. Nitrates . . . . . . . . Cheaper than day rates

 23. Node . . . . . . . . . . I knew it

 24. Outpatient . . . . . . A person who has fainted

 25. Pap Smear . . . . . A lie about someone's Pappy

 26. Pelvis . . . . . . . . . Second cousin to Elvis

 27. Post Operative . . . A letter carrier

 28. Recovery Room . . Place to do upholstery

 29. Rectum . . . . . . . . Damn near killed him

 30. Secretion . . . . . . . Hiding something

 31. Seizure . . . . . . . . Roman emperor

 32. Tablet . . . . . . . . . A small table

 33. Terminal Illness . . Getting sick at the airport

 34. Tumor . . . . . . . . . More than one

 35. Urine . . . . . . . . . . Opposite you're out

 36. Varicose . . . . . . . Near by/close by

HUMOR

A Nurse's Wish

A Paramedic's Wish

The Rules Of EMS

You Might Be In EMS If...

The Difference Between God And A Paramedic

EMT Definitions of Firefighter Terms

New Mexico Law

Private Sector Annual Survey

EMS Medical Terminology

EMS One-Liners

Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery

EMS Run Report Acronyms

Redneck Dictionary Of Medical Terms

Wanted: EMTs And Paramedics

Beast Medic From Hell