::Redneck Dictionary Of Medical Terms::

Redneck Dictionary Of Medical Terms

1. Benign . . . . What you be after you be eight

2. Artery . . . . . . . . . . . The study of paintings

3. Bacteria . . . . . . . . . Back door to cafeteria

4. Barium . . . . What doctors do when patients die

5. Cesarean Section . . . A neighborhood in Rome

6. CAT Scan . . . . . . . Searching for kitty

7. Cauterize . . . . . . . . Made eye contact with her

8. Colic . . . . . . . . . . . A sheep dog

9. Coma . . . . . . . . . . A punctuation mark

10. D & C . . . . . . . . . . Where Washington is

11. Dilate . . . . . . . . . . To live long

12. Enema . . . . . . . . . Not a friend

13. Fester . . . . . . . . . Quicker than someone else

14. Fibula . . . . . . . . . . A small lie

15. Genital . . . . . . . . . non-Jewish person

16. GI Series . . . World Series of military baseball

17. Hangnail . . . . . . What you hang your coat on

18. Impotent . . . . . . . .Distinguished, well known

19. Labor Pain . . . . . . Getting hurt at work

20. Medical Staff . . . . .A Doctor's cane

21. Morbid . . . . . . . . . A higher offer than I bid

22. Nitrates . . . . . . . . Cheaper than day rates

23. Node . . . . . . . . . . I knew it

24. Outpatient . . . . . . A person who has fainted

25. Pap Smear . . . . . A lie about someone's Pappy

26. Pelvis . . . . . . . . . Second cousin to Elvis

27. Post Operative . . . A letter carrier

28. Recovery Room . . Place to do upholstery

29. Rectum . . . . . . . . Damn near killed him

30. Secretion . . . . . . . Hiding something

31. Seizure . . . . . . . . Roman emperor

32. Tablet . . . . . . . . . A small table

33. Terminal Illness . . Getting sick at the airport

34. Tumor . . . . . . . . . More than one

35. Urine . . . . . . . . . . Opposite you're out

36. Varicose . . . . . . . Near by/close by

HUMOR